Meh...

Okay a RL post. What a novelty right? Seems I only do those here because I know anyone who bothers to even read this blog won't leave any comments or probably will not know what I'm even talking about.

Anyhoo it's Mother's day and I am worn out. Traveling to my mother's and visiting with her, then having lunch with the boys wore me out. I know a great deal has to do with the little to no protein in my current diet so I am going to go shopping for a non milk based protein additive and see if that won't give me a bit more boost this week.

My Mother's Day dinner was cream of chicken soup and a grilled cheese sandwich which I could only eat after making sure to thoroughly soak the sandwich in my soup so I could basically slurp it. Hey it's flavor right now and more substance than just broth. Mean while the rest of the family had steak and potatoes. Nice. :(

While I'm thrilled my procedure has (hopefully) fixed my TMD woes, I still have six more weeks of this no chew diet. Face it, just after two weeks I am sick of 'cream' soups, yoghurts, applesauce, puddings, jello, cream of wheat and broths. Although the ice cream I had last week was very good, I just have to remember not to have chocolate chip again. Plain flavored ice cream from now on. Plus mashing and/or turning "regular" food to mush in the blender is just completely unappetizing and it doesn't do the job 100% and I still end up picking out the tiny bits of food because I simply can't chew even if I wanted too.

So on the positive note, the incision site on my ear is almost already non existent. If you don't know what to look for, you don't see it which is really nice. Wish the same could be said for the incision on my stomach. It looks crappy and tonight it feels hot and it's swollen; but the good news, at least the drainage has stopped. No more bandages to be changed.

So while the procedure was TOTALLY worth getting rid of the TMJ pain, the recovery sucks and in part why I'm writing this here and not Livejournal because I'm tired of folks telling me to keep a positive outlook. I'd have an even more positive outlook if I could, you know, eat some real food instead of only cooking it and watching everyone else around me eat and not have six more weeks of this to look forwards too; and even then after six weeks, it's still a soft food diet.

Most people get cranky when they don't get to eat lunch on time and wonder why I get cranky these days. It's hard not to get prissy when your hungry all the time and can't do shit about it and have to appear to be 'happy' and 'positive' so the people around you won't feel guilty about the fact I can't eat and they can.

*takes breath*


Ah well. I'll shut up now. I got this out of my system and I feel a bit better.